Searching for Inspiration
by Ghost Flame
Summary: Shigure's struggle with writer's block is unexpectedly interrupted by the most unlikely of people. Hana and Shigure discuss life... and contemplate each other. Oneshot.


_Searching for Inspiration_

_By Ghost Flame_

Shigure Sohma sat on his front porch, deftly balancing a pencil on his upper lip, which, at the moment, was his only entertainment.

"Awwwwww," Shigure whined, "This is no fun at all!"

No indeed. Writing a story that was due to his editor the next day was definitely the opposite of fun. How could he be expected to concentrate when he had no inspiration at all? Perhaps moving to a different position would help.

No, it didn't. He moved back, the pencil magically remained on his lip. Crossing his arms and closing his eyes, Shigure sighed.

"Hello." A monotone voice said form the left and slightly in front of him.

The pencil dropped off his lip and went rolling across the porch. His eyes flew open and focused on a certain creepy gothic girl.

"Dahhhhhhh!"

Ah, yes. It was Tohru's friend, Saki Hanajima. His rather unmanly cry ended once he recognized her. After a moment his surprise was replaced with unease. She was just standing there. And staring, can't forget the staring. She wasn't even really looking at him. She was just staring. Another moment passed and as Miss Hanajima didn't seem to have an overwhelming urge to say anything…

Shigure cleared his throat. "If you are looking for Tohru, I'm afraid she is at the hospital at the moment."

"No."

Shigure shifted, "I'm fairly certain she's at the hospital, Miss Hanajima."

"I was walking past and sensed some distressed vibrations coming from near the house."

Shigure put his hands in the air and shook his head, "Yuki and Kyou aren't here either. No distressed vibrations at all. Although you know…"

Hana raised a hand and pointed at him, "They are coming from you, Shigure Sohma."

Shigure's eyes went blank for a moment, "Are they now?"

"Yes."

Rubbing the back of his head, Shigure found himself disturbed but slightly… intrigued… by this girl before him.

"Did you come to see if something was wrong with poor, humble Shigure?"

Hana cocked one eyebrow ever so slightly at the word "humble" and replied, "No. I came to see if something was amiss, the victim of such distressed vibrations was not in the front of my mind."

Why had she come? Hana thought to herself, she'd known the vibrations had not been coming from Tohru. And if she were completely honest with herself, she knew they had been Shigure's. Instead, Hana choose to not ponder her motives beyond the altruistically obvious ones she had given to Shigure.

"Well, uhhhh… nothing's wrong, nothing at all, not even the slightest little thing to worry about."

She blinked at him and dispassionately stated, "I'll go make some tea."

Shigure froze as she stepped onto the porch and slid open the door. Reaching out to her with one hand he managed a feeble, "Wait…" before the door had slid shut again. Lowering his arm in defeat, Shigure moaned, "Nobody ever listens to poor Shigure… what a cold, hard world it is…"

Inside, Hana began preparing the tea and pondered once again why she had been compelled to come. The Sohma family's vibrations had struck her as intriguing from the moment she had met the different members of the family. They were… off… somehow. Something was not quite right about them and she'd always felt that they were hiding something. Something big. Something important. So she really couldn't attribute that to the intrigue she'd felt when she first met Shigure.

He was rather an object of withdrawn interest to her, nothing too overt. He had possessed those same vibrations that were so different in the Sohma family. But there was something else. Yes, he often acted rather foolish but Hana could sense he had intelligence and cunning that he chose not to share, perhaps an underlying strength of will, like he always knew more than he let on. Hana finished making the tea with the mild thought that she'd like to get to know Shigure better floating in her mind.

Outside, Shigure sat in a subdued state of shock. First Hanajima just shows up at his house, having sensed his destrested in-search-of-inspiration-but-not-finding-any waves and then she offers to make tea. Well, no, not really, Shigure corrected to himself, she didn't really offer, she'd just stated that she would. He tapped his chin thoughtfully with the end of his pencil. Yes, that Hanajima girl was definitely a strange one. She was… interesting. Obviously fiercely loyal to those she cared about, regarding the speech she'd given on New Year's, so that Tohru wouldn't be alone.

And then… that night in the rain. When Kyou had transformed and as Shigure, himself, had said, none but Tohru could get through to him. Shigure regretted not knowing the details of that night, he felt it would be unwise to pry, but he did know that Hanajima had found Tohru that night. Found her, and forced her to move on. That was another thing, Shigure thought and tapped the pencil again to his chin, she seemed to just know things. Shigure shifted his weight uncomfortably and wondered how long it would be until she discovered the curse. It did not even seem to be a question of if… only when. Yes, Miss Hanajima was interesting indeed… perhaps… he wouldn't mind getting to know her…

The door to the front porch opened and the very person it had been about jerked Shigure from his silent reverie. Hana walked over to Shigure, placed the tea tray before him and knelt on the other side of it. They drank their tea in silence for several minutes. Shigure worked up his nerve and finally asked the question that had been plaguing him, in the most non-chalant tone he could muster. "So, what happened that night in the rain?"

Shigure regarded her and smiled slightly as she blinked in something resembling surprise.

The question had taken her aback but it was Shigure's light tone that surprised her, like he was talking about the weather. He was good. Very good. Hana felt a strange satisfaction that her early assessment had been correct. Shigure Sohma definitely knew more than he let on.

There was no need to ask Shigure what night he was referring to. Hana remembered every aspect of it vividly. But how had Shigure known? And just how much did he know? A strange thought occurred to her, "He probably is aware of a great deal more than I am."

She decided to answer him honestly, "I don't know."

Hana took a sip of tea as Shigure continued to regard her. "Don't you now? I find that hard to believe. You were there after all."

She glanced down at her tea, unable to meet his gaze. Her tone remained unchanged. "But I didn't know what was happening, only that I was needed." She felt compelled to indulge his interest more. "I knew that Tohru needed me and if I didn't go, something unpleasant would happen."

"Where did you find her?"

Hana noted that he had not asked HOW she had found Tohru, only where.

"At her mother's grave. I made her leave even though Arisa tried to stop me."

"I see." Shigure said and Hana had the feeling that perhaps, he really did.

"Did I… error?" She was surprised that she asked him, he was surprised as well.

Shigure regarded her for a second. "No." He stated simply.

Hana raised her eyes to meet his. He was struck by how elegantly, simply attractive she was. It occurred to him that she wished for him to elaborate.

"Tohru had some thing important to do and she needed someone to urge her on."

Hana seemed to relax slightly. Shigure suddenly realized that not only had Hana wanted a touch of reassurance, she had trusted his knowledge and opinion. It reminded him how young she was. Of course, Shigure had always known she was Tohru's age, she had just always acted with a height of maturity and poise that many adults failed to ever reach. There didn't seem to be any need to remind himself that he was often considered to be one of those adults.

"And you," her monotone came, "What did you do that night."

He was greatful that Hana had not asked him what happened that night, perhaps she knew not to pry as well.

"Not as much as I could have." Though the abstract thought that he did do more than others fleeted briefly through his head.

Hana raised a quizzical eyebrow at him as if to say, "And…?"

Shigure felt somewhat uncomfortable with her desire to hear more… but she had been frank with him… he felt as though he owed her the same respect.

A dark look flashed across his face. It was a look that seemed out of place on his usually optimistic features. It was almost hatred. "I told Akito off, not that it was much help." Shigure let out a humorless chuckle in a vain attempt to lighten his previous words.

Hana paused. Akito… that name rang a bell. Akito… he had come to their school once. His waves had been so grating and erratic; she could almost feel her powers scream at the very memory. And… Shigure had… had stood up to him. Hana found herself… impressed.

"Do you… regret not doing more?"

Shigure took her in fully, then tapped a hand lightly to his chin, "I could say that I did or do now, but I know at the time it felt like the right thing to do. Going back and analyzing all of your actions is pointless. You become trapped in the past and then begin to distort what you remember. If your actions were right, you may change your perspective until they seem wrong. If they were wrong, how are you to know for sure? And even if you did, it would not change the actions you took at the time. Human emotions are fickle, human memory worst. All I can truly tell you is that the choice I made to stay largely out of the whole affair felt right when I made it. I think that the present should be focused on, and the past be left for reflection, to hopefully learn from for the future… but not to dwell on."

Hana blinked. She had forgotten how much Shigure liked to hear himself talk. But even so, she found that she was not irritated by his prattle. Quite the opposite. Hana was surprised that she had paid strict attention and realized that Shigure hade made a valid, thoughtful point.

"Perhaps you have a point." Hana allowed in her usual monotone.

As for Shigure, he was surprised she had even paid attention to his ramblings. People rarely did.

Silence consumed the two for a moment as they mulled over what had been said. Hana realized in surprise that it would be easy for her to be friends with Shigure.

"Sooooo…" Shigure drawled when the silence became slightly awkward. Say something, Shigure, anything, just to get her to talk a little more.

Shigure said in the same casual drawl, "I hear the students at school are terrified of you." He took another sip of tea.

Hana watched him curiously. Why on earth had he brought something like that up? Was he… trying to… trick her… somehow.?

"They know if they cross me, my electrical waves do not wear off for weeks."

A shutter ran up Shigure's spine as he fervently wished he hadn't asked. Creepy gothic girl indeed.

Hana took note of Shigure's growing discomfort. With a flash of her eyes and a faded smile, Hana instantaneously decided to exploit such discomfort and encourage it to blossom.

"Or my little brother will put a curse on them."

Shigure's eyes went blank as he stuttered in a vaguely higher voice, "Is… is that so. Cu…Curse?"

Hana nodded sharply. He was sorta cute in a puppy-dog way when he was scared.

Having a sinking feeling he'll wish he'd hadn't asked his next question, Shigure continued, "Wh… what kind of curse."

Glancing at him, Hana said pointedly, "Not one you would be familiar with."

Hana suddenly felt as if Shigure's eyes were piercing into the deepest corners of her soul. With cunning, intelligence. With understanding but without mercy. It was a look she had not seen before. Similar to the look he held for Akito, though slightly less menacing. Such a contradicting character he was. One minute acting as though the world was coming to an end, the next looking as though he were the cause of it. A strange thought, or perhaps not so strange, came to her, "Perhaps the Sohma's suffer from a curse of their own. That would explain why I always felt their vibrations were unusual. It would explain a good deal of other occurrences as well."

As quickly as the look had come, it was gone. She would pursue it another day, or perhaps just let it pass until he wished to share.

Shigure's singsong voice came, "Does he really put a curse on them."

Hana's lips twitched upwards. "Perhaps," she evaded.

"Oh… Miss Hanajima! How cruel and unforgiving your taunting is! To frighten high school girls and hapless writers."

Hana let silence fall between them as Shigure began humming something about high school girls. She was forcefully reminded that Shigure was something of a pervert. And nearly eleven years her senior. For some reason the fact that she had even thought of the latter bothered her more than both things combined. Perhaps she had been enjoying herself a bit too much with Shigure. This was starting to feel too much like a date. Right. Back to business.

"Why are you distressed?"

Shigure stopped humming and looked at her blankly. She could almost hear his gears clicking.

Distressed. Was he distressed, Shigure poundered. Yes, yes he had been distressed because… something. Talking with Hana had made him forget. Now what was it?

Hana watched as Shigure's eyes blanked for several minutes and then widened in shock and revelation.

"Dahhhhh! Oh Miss Hanajima you are very truly cruel. To ease my pain and then bring it back ten fold!"

She raised an eyebrow at him as if to say, "Well…?"

"I have a story due to my editor tomorrow!"

He buried his face in his hands as Hana stared at him, "So?"

"So!" Shigure couldn't believe his ears, "So! Miss Hanajima, I haven't even started!"

"Well, what are you waiting for?"

He lowered his hand and looked at her incredulously. "Oh, Miss Hanajima! Such innocence. I have no inspiration! None at all. How can I write if I have no inspiration?"

Hana smiled slightly, "I guess that is my cue to be on my way."

Before Shigure could object, Hana stood, stepped off the porch and said, "Good luck… Shigure Sohma." A light breeze rustled Hana's cloak and she took a few steps toward the road before Shigure stood.

"Wait." Shigure's tone tone was plaintively urgent with an edge of authority in it.

She stopped and Shigure stepped off the porch. Hana turned her head, her fathomless eyes bore into his just as his had done earlier to hers.

Shigure suddenly felt awkward after his outburst. "I enjoyed our conversation…" His voice sounded an octave higher in his head than it usually did. "Feel free to… uhhhh… drop by again anytime Miss Hanajima."

The rest of Hana's body rotated until she was facing him again. She seemed to glid across the ground closing the space between them until it was mere inches. Shigure absently noted that she smelled vaguely of spearmint.

"I'll keep that offer in mind Shigure Sohma. It would be easy to become friends."

Shigure found himself rubbing the back of his head and chuckling awkwardly, "Yes, I tend to think so too." He wished that she would back away just a tad.

Hana leaned up and brushed his cheek almost inperceptively with her lips. Shigure's eyes widened and he blinked blankly.

As she drew away her eyes flashed and a knowing smirk drifted across her face. "Good luck with your inspiration."

Shigure wondered briefly if she had planned that.

She turned sharply and walked with a graceful sway down the path. A breeze whipped through her black cloak; giving it that mystic rustle that only she seemed capable of achieving. Shigure was trying to work out what that had been about when her soft voice drifted to his sensitive ears.

"I wish you pleasant electric waves this year."

Watching her retreating form, Shigure scratched the back of his head in puzzlement, fighting the urge to smile. Whatever that had been, he had a feeling that, one way or another, his electric waves this year would, indeed, be pleasant.


End file.
